It's been seven years?

I was running some errands after lunch, and it hit me....it is June 1st! To most people, this day doesn't mean a whole lot. Yeah, most people have gotten their paycheck, paid the house note/rent, and changed the calendar.

But seven years ago, my heart broke.

See, I had this great friend we will call D. She took life by the horns. She had a beautiful family. She, herself, was beautiful, both inside and out.

A little while before I got married.....her world was shattered. She was diagnosed with colon cancer. We held hands in the hospital, MD Anderson's, at church, and at home. I had the girls over for many nights for sleepovers with another little friend, Mg, and watched movies and munched on grilled cheese sandwiches with tomato soup.

The things I will remember most about her was her faith. She taught me what it was love without abandon.....to love our Lord with everything we have.  She taught me how to love people! She taught me how to be an awesome and loving wife. She taught me how to love my children the way Jesus loves us. She taught me how to tackle adversity and hold on to Jesus. She taught me how to be a friend.

At the time all of this was happening, I truly thought God was going to make a miracle! I thought for sure that if He would heal anyone, He would heal her.

He did heal her....but by His terms, not mine. I was selfish. I wanted her here to help me raise my kids. I wanted our kids to be so close you would think they were brothers and sisters.

But, God healed her heart. Not her cancer. And while at the church office that morning, preparing for a busy summer, our world turned upside down. D went to be with the Lord. I was heartbroken, angry, mad, sad....you name it!

Eventually, through a lot of events, we all healed somewhat. We will never forget her. I had my "own" plan for what our lives would be like, even if D passed away. But God had different plans.

Now we live in another town, go to another church, and hardly ever cross paths with our friends from back then..........

Two months later, I would find that I was expecting my first child. Oh, how I wished D could have been here to see this one.....she would be laughing her head off at us. I am sure that D and J would have been big buddies. She would have loved his love for life.

She would have loved M just as much. His smile reminds me a lot of hers. I think he has the kind of heart she had. :)

Oh, how I wish she could be here now to see these two..........

But, I know that is selfish of me. She is with our heavenly Father. I kind of like to think that she and God have had their share of laughs at my crazy life since she went "home".

Miss you, girl! Can't wait to see you again. I can only imagine.....................

- for Cookie and Chan :)